Being an Artist

There are days, even months, when the desire to create art seems to have evaporated. If this lack of motivation or absense of the Muse occurs at a time when I am working on artwork for someone else, it is like having to go to a job you hate. I am currently in such a fugue. During this time of unemployment, when I certainly have the time to make art, I just can't seem to get it done. (Of course, I am preoccupied with finding a job). When I think back to the times when I have been most prolific, I find those were times when I was most busy with a job, family, social life, etc. I have noticed, also, that when I am absolutely unable to make art due to other obligations, that is when I really WANT to make art.

I am aware of the tension which exists when making art. It is a combination of excitement in getting started on a painting (combined with the desire to finish it and move on to something else), and the wish to be doing something else entirely. Frequently, being an artist is a bit of a handicap, a curse if you will, because others feel it is a god-given talent which can be called up on a moment's notice. Others think it is easy for an artist to just whip out a masterpiece any time he/she wants to. Not so. Making art is the most difficult undertaking of my life, one which calls to me on one hand, and which I reject on the other. Sometimes I deliberately postpone working on art in favor of doing something of no consequence or importance. Almost as if I am avoiding doing that which ultimately brings me joy when a piece of art is finished and I perceive it to be decent, if not good.

I also know that when I was making art every day, it became a habit, like eating. Working at a fulltime job makes it difficult to be prolific, though. It is necessary to make art every day in order to become good at it, just like practicing a musical instrument.